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The More Happy Blog You Can Do Hard Things: Designing a Life You'll Love

You Can Do Hard Things: Designing a Life You'll Love

10/16/2023


We spend a lot of our lives avoiding hard things.

We want life to be easy so we choose the paths of least resistance. Those worn paths tell us it's safe - that others have come before us and have walked these trails.

They aren't bad trails. Yet there's something pulling us to go off course and follow our hearts. Something is out there, off the path, that is ours to find and enjoy and love.

But leaving the path is hard, so we ignore the pull and stay the course.

A friend of mine wisely said that you know you're doing life right when it feels hard. Part of me hates this truth. The other part finds comfort in it. Reassurance even.

Because choosing to do the hard things means you are actively designing life on your terms. You aren't in default mode.

No, the hard life means you're in full design mode. And with that comes unwanted input, judgement and lots of self-doubt.

When we design a life that looks different from the norm, well, that's hard. The systems and support aren't in place for it. And so it can feel really lonely choosing that path.

Guess what? We can do hard things.

I can do hard things.

This has been my mantra lately because there have been a lot of hard choices on my path. Choices like:

What's the right school for my kids?
What direction do I take my business in?
What do I want for myself?
What does a healthy relationship look like?
What kind of life am I designing?


All of these questions have answers, yet some are harder than others. That's because some answers pull me toward the uncharted path where I know I will find resistance. The path that's not marked by societal norms, that I have to figure out on my own.

This path is less crowded, and well, it can be lonely.

I can do hard things.

Those hard answers are also where I know I will find joy. And peace. And adventure. And all those things I want my life to be built around. There will be people there - people who share those same values, who are drawn toward that same fully designed life that I am.

I can do hard things.

All these questions I wrestle with aren't really about the answers at all. They are about the voice telling me to stay the course, to follow the expectations laid out for me by society. It's fear. Fear wants me to take the easy path.

I can do hard things.

I don't want to live by default. So I have to keep fear in its place. I listen to that voice. I respect it. I give thanks for it. And then I choose to keep designing life on my terms.

I can do hard things.

Raising kids. Running a business. Investing in a relationship. Choosing myself. These are all hard things if done right.

And right for me is different than right for you. We all have our own paths. And we all have fear trying to keep us on the well-trodded trail of life. But what more is out there for us? What is fear keeping us from?

We can do hard things.

Yes, we can. We can also support one another as we answer the hard questions and design lives we love.

Book a free coaching conversation today.

You can do hard things. I promise.


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